New Product Launch
Sharp enterprises brings you Emotional Prophylactic™...now in a can!
A breakthrough in polymer technology new Emotional Prophylactic™ is the easy solution to those annoying ambiguous relationships with other people. You’ll never have to worry about how you’ll affect someone else ever again.
Sick of struggling to think of yet another conveniently vague prior engagement so you don’t get anyone’s hopes up, ever? Finding it hard to maintain the casual air of courtesy combined with distance that is required for most interactions in the modern world?
Well Emotional Prophylactic ™ is definitely for you. Just one spray from head to foot will create an invisible, odourless, and biodegradable barrier between your emotions and those of your acquaintances. One application can last up to 10 showers. And as soon as you start to feel exposed or vulnerable just reapply!* Never wonder how you make someone feel again! Order on the internet for only AUD$34.99 today. Special offer for Buzz’s regular readers – one free tube of Ego-salve™ lotion, for those raw days.
*Sharp enterprises takes no responsibility for any adverse effects of this product. Reactions may occur based entirely on the users individual genetic makeup. Side effects may include redness, itching, or overwhelming despair and cynicism. Always conduct a patch test before applying.