Turning Japanese

Thanks, Betty Sue.

Guantanamero

Well bugger me, David Hicks has pleaded guilty to the charges of terrorism. Otherwise known as "going to fight for the other side and providing world leaders with an opportunity to look tough".

If he does make it quick smart back to Australia in time for an election, and is shoved away in an Australian jail, I wonder whether he'd be hero or villain to other inmates.

famous mates

All the cool kids are apparently on MySpace. Just doing a bit of catching up on the world of musos and comedians to see that both Dave and the Bit by bat kids are going great guns. Rip it Up says of Dave's Adelaide show..

Bloustien is a 'thinking person's comedian' who, via the hilarity of his many dry observations, makes some really interesting points. The addition of a xylophone to help the audience separate fact from fiction was a fun touch and used to great effect throughout the show.

and the Bats, on their first full album on returning from a music festival in Canada, get:

"the best Cure album in the last 2 decades."

bwahahahahaha! Hi Pete! I've got yr Siouxie poster up as the feature of my home office in case you're reading. I use all that stuff you taught me about interesting writing every day now.. Good luck on the Australia tour!

Oh, and also this:

Forget the portly, in-it-for-the-money Pixies reunion. Don't bother with the new Stooges album. Instead, get thee to a store for the Bit By Bats album, where the Melbourians give us energised post-punk rythms mixed with real melodies, lashings of choppy and sometimes vicious guitars mixed with danceable basslines..

from the SMH no less. Aunty B feeling decidedly dowdy right now, the closest I've got to new music recently is some Kaiser Chiefs and Regina Spektor.

Watching: The rain out the window
Reading: Greer (a biography)
Listening to: Jolene (Dolly Parton's original version)

Reasons to be cheerful

1) My team of 4 came 3rd in pub trivia on Tuesday night. Third! We were just one or two points off second which gets you $25 to spend at the bar. It's because our pop and media diva (not me) knew every the real name of every cast member of Beverly Hills 90210. And the Roberta Flack back catalogue. And there was only one cricket question.

2) Blood test results back say I've just got slightly low b12 levels. Not really scary, but haven't heard if there's a gnarly little bacteria down there.

3) Have been swimming at the beach on 4 days out of the last 6.

4) Two new direct requests for work this week. In the meantime didn't get a tender that was put in under competitive conditions, but it's nice to be asked without competitors, no?

5) Have been sharing the flat with the irrepressible Mr B since October. (thats nearly 5 whole months, some kind of record I think). His mad Aquarian stars are lining up and throwing out all kinds of interesting opportunities, so hopefully he doesn't feel quite so institutionalised these days.

6) Going to the Melbourne comedy festival over Easter with my crazy sister. We are determinedly not going to talk about work. (much)

Alternative title - Bsharp counts her blessings - one of the keys to happiness, apparently. (At least 5 required, daily).

Word of the week

dyspepsia (dĭs-pěp'shə) - 1. Disturbed digestion; indigestion 2. a disorder of digestive function characterized by discomfort or heartburn or nausea

dyspeptic (dĭs-pěp'tĭk) - 1. Pertaining to, subject to, or suffering from dyspepsia; 2.Gloomy, pessimistic and irritable, n. a person subject to or suffering from dyspepsia.

This is the term the GP used yesterday to describe the symptoms I was reporting (yet again) in the last couple of weeks. She used it to differentiate the upper part of the digestive tract from the lower which is more likely to be associated with irritable bowel syndrome, which, while a very glamorous blog post topic, does not appear to be what I suffer from. And let me just inform you dear reader, that each year, this tricky bloody tract seems to knock your Aunty B just that bit harder. I am teetering on the edge of blogging all symptoms tests and treatments to try to make some sense of the whole thing and perhaps capture the medical wisdoms of mermaidgrrrl (after she's delivered a healthy baby and back to her own usual rosy state of health of course).

But for now, let me retreat into metaphor. In a freaky intercontinental convergence dyspepsia is the word chosen just a few days ago by Momus to describe his reaction to a new blog which focuses on marketing, market research and the consumer-over-all culture of the world. A term closely related to bilious, also both an emotional and physical state. Two well justified responses in a nation whose governments pays for fighter jets over climate change strategies, where we have a seemingly flexible approach to human rights and torture of citizens, where we do energy efficiency by flier drop, and where Dancing with the Stars is our top rating TV show (for example).

So in the last 24 hours or so I have enough time in a doctor's waiting room, a pathology lab and a cafe to get through two editions of Marie Clare, one of Who, one of New Weekly and one of New Woman, all in Sydney's highest income belt. Page after page of belts, A-line skirts, patent heel shoes, natural-look makeup, party-look makeup, win Cameron Diaz's outfit, win Kylie's new fragrance, win a summer wardrobe, how to survive the sales, how to avoid a yeast overload (strictly vodka with no sugar mixer apparently), where to get a bling watch, look at the pretty shiny things ladies, look! look! It was like a whirlwind of glitter and frou and razzle and dazzle not to mention the endless parade of Brit, J-lo, Lindsey, Liz, Gwen, Kylie, Nic and Paris. Boobies! Eyebrows! Bellies! Hair! Skin tone! Eyeshadow, darling eyeshadow. With sparkles. So much lip gloss you could just drown in it, become engrossed, swallow it whole, drink it down and and keep on swallowing. So maybe the cure for my ills lies not in the actual tests in these labs - blood tests, breath tests,* and wot not, its in the magazines. Read them, read them, stop analysing, stop chewing it over, stop bringing stuff up, stop with the dyspeptic disposition young lady. Not to want to labour a point or anything.

*nb - it'll be iron , various vitamin b levels, liver function, and heliobacter being sought out this time, for medi-nerds out there. Next might be a camera down the gullet. Stay tuned for more blog fun if that happens.

Its just a jump to the left...

Apart from borrowing from Miss J's series of song lyric-post-titles, just wanted to point you all in the direction of an article from The Age, by Micheal Leunig called "Leftie me"..

It has come to my notice that there is an impressive number of columnists, intellectuals and commentators - mostly serious, highly educated men, who spend much time studying and much energy proclaiming my depraved leftism, carefully combing through my words and my drawings of little ducks, looking for contradictions and moral tumours with a passion and diligence that would seem beyond the call of duty.

. . . there is also evidence of some fierce, kinky desire to strip me naked and administer humiliation - and presumably, having escalated themselves to that threshold, to then disembowel me and eat a piece of my flesh by way of stealing my secret and magical left-wing pixie powers.

But leftism is not an easy or magical ride these days, for despite the fantastic drugs and wild sex, certain new problems have emerged.

Found via Null Device.

Climate Criminal

Me n Mr Biz saw this while driving on the Newcastle Freeway. Its an imported HUMV or Hummer.



Sadly, taking a photo up that close probably made the dude think we were fans. I suppose we were freeway users at the time too, albeit in a borrowed Ford laser.

The Kids are Alright Pt 3

I wrote this down while I was sitting on a bus going from the North Shore towards the city. It was a group of school students, sitting behind me. It was about the visit of Dick Cheney to Sydney.

"They closed the bridge just so he could have lunch with John Howard"

"Yeah, and the tunnel"

"And they changed the NSW State laws to allow the bodyguards to carry pistols"

"That's fucken disgusting."

"Yeh, cause if they shoot a citizen they're immune."